How I Found My Dream House and then Got Homeless
Two years ago, I took the biggest leap in my life. The journey toward that I saw clearly in my visions. This is the story of how my visions manifested in real life.
Over the last weeks, I’ve had a lot of insights about manifesting. It has crossed my mind for a long time, like how this turned out for me and what that actually looks like. The most vivid example was with finding my dream house, a place where I wanted to live. Back in 2021 at the end of the year I started doing this, combining and bringing together multiple techniques that I had learned. The year before, I followed courses about abundance and learned how to write and visualize this for myself. What I want and what I need to let go of for that, to meditate on this through visualization, and making things big. Earlier In 2021 this was followed by finding a teacher online who educates about generational trauma, childhood wounding, and how to heal yourself from that. Her programs also contain abundance, but on a much deeper level. Besides that, I had switched to a plant based eating lifestyle, including a full reset of my digestive system, giving me back my energy, flexibility, vitality, basically my health.
The house that I was living in was my family house, a place where I felt stuck. Growing up with abusive and narcissistic parents left me with PTSD and a feeling of being powerless. Things I wasn’t aware of, until I started looking into it and opening up the rabbit hole. What came out I share in detail in other stories, the most important conclusion was that it was time to leave this house and find one for myself. I knew that things didn’t feel right and that I wanted to do something about it. Coming from the same place of where the problems originated had left me stranded for over 16 years. Whatever I tried, it just didn’t work, besides solving some issues on a surface level and keep on going hoping for something better. Finding the abundance courses, plant based lifestyle switch, digestive reset, and healing childhood trauma were gifts from heaven. These are just a few things I did to turn my life around, there’s a lot more. However, they for sure made the biggest impact and brought me way more than I could have ever wished for. I’ll be happy to share more about that in my writings.
Back to the manifesting journey. In between all the big transitions and the tools, teachers, courses, and programs that came my way, I found practical tools and resources to work with this. Among others, a short blog post on Medium where someone shared his visualization techniques. Pointing out to especially do this before sleep, during meditation, and after waking up. The moments that the brain expresses lower brain wave activity and when in a dream state. Reading books from Neville Goddard told the same over and over. The abundance courses and the teacher that I had found had similar ways of describing this. The more specific, the better is the main rule. One day my teacher shared specifically about creating your own dream house, seeing how it looks like, what you want to have in the house, the rooms, etc. Off I went.
Creating a Dream House in my Mind
For days I would pick a few moments during the day, where I would write about my dream house, from very general to more specific. Random moments, no planning, writing when it comes up. Morning pages, as described in Julia Cameron’s book The Artist’s Way, were an outlet where it just came out. The more specific it became, to more I could see it in front of me. The kitchen with all the tools for my cooking adventures, a creative studio, a forest with the sun shining over it during sunrise, doing yoga on a roof terrace, garage below the main floor, big windows to let the sunlight come in, bedroom where the morning sun wakes you up, bathroom with a large bath, it was all there. A mixture between modern shapes and a warm and light interior.
Later, with other visualizations, I could see myself walking through the rooms. In the kitchen, using the blender, kitchen machine, or slow juicer to work with fresh fruits and vegetables. Taking a warm bath with magnesium salt and essential oils. Doing early morning yoga during sunrise, smelling the scents of the flowers and fresh herbs growing on the roof terrace. Parking my car or motor cycle in the garage, after driving down the drive in. Working with my hands in the garden, with the plants, vegetables, and fruit trees. Painting or drawing in the arts studio, seeing the beautiful mess around me. Having a guitar available to jam and a place to record. Going for a walk in the forest, trail running, spotting birds, deer, and other animals. This time, the pictures weren’t super clear, but it seemed to work.
Without a clear idea what to expect, I didn’t see any results on the short term. Weeks passed by without any sign, so I decided to leave it for a while. Turns out that’s actually what’s needed, I wasn’t really aware of that back then. Make a clear picture and then just surrender. My attention was needed for what was happening in front of my eyes. The gap between me and my family becoming larger and larger every day, a clear sign to leave home. Time to leave the pack and create my own life, what I’d been longing for half of my life.
Making Space for Taking the Leap of My Life
I found a 7-Days course online about getting rid of the clutter and organizing your house and your life. Based on the Kon Mari method, I started straight away. Simultaneously, during a weekly community recording that I was a part of, the same method came up. Going through my closet, looking what clothes to keep and which to let go of. Long story short, 80% went out, the preparation for leaving had begun. Again, no plan, only the aim to go. The tools I came across along the way guided me through the process. At the same time, changes where happening inside the house. I had a large pantry full of herbs, spices, and dry ingredients next to the kitchen. Enough to start a restaurant and create anything I would like from all edges of the world, the kitchen was my space of creation.
My mother decided that she wanted the pantry for my father, who was working remote after covid had hit. An old closet with drawers from my sister came over and the idea was to move everything I had over there. It was late in the year, just before Christmas. One morning I remember getting something to drink out of the kitchen. At the same time I saw her occupied with moving stuff from one place to the other. I was there, she walked passed me, but no awareness of my presence. I went on with what I was doing, returning a bit later. Then she told me she’d moved everything from A to B. “I know, I observed you doing that”, was my response. “Oh, okay. I didn’t see you. So, now you know”, she answered.
Close to my house, within 15 minutes walking, there was a small forest. Never went in the first 18 years that I lived there, the last period it became one of my sweet spots. Big oak trees were that ones that caught the most attention, among the numerous swans, geese, birds, butterflies, dragonflies, and occasionally a deer or a squirrel. From halfway 2021, I went there to do meditative journeys. Connecting with my Higher Self, guiding me on my soul journey, while asking for protection and guidance of Jesus (the real one, the man who walked on Earth). The last time I went, it was clear that I was going to leave home. Before Christmas Eve, I walked to my favorite spot, sitting with my back against the biggest oak tree. I’d done it before, asking my Higher Self what I needed to see at that moment. Eyes closed this time as well, let the journey begin. No expectations upfront.
Seeing My Visions and Dream House in Real Time
After about 5 minutes, visions started to come through. Vivid, intense, clear. Starting as a picture, then speeding up like watching a movie. Typical Dutch red bicycle roads, with forest trees on the right and on the left. Next to an asphalt road, where cars were parked on the side. It was like watching myself driving on these roads, enjoying the landscape. It kept going and going, for minutes and minutes, seemingly without end. From the first moment, I recognized the area instantly, within the area with the biggest forests in The Netherlands. A spot where I experienced deep inner peace for the first time, one year before that. Near the end I had a realization that I already had a destination to move to next, Spain. I started picturing the beaches and the sunrise and sunset, to my best capabilities. The picture was blurry at the start, but became more clear over time. I stopped at that moment, coming back to moving my body slowly and opening my eyes. Checking the time, over an hour had passed.
Monday after Christmas I took the leap of faith. Everything was packed and ready, closets cleared out, only food to bring with me. That was the hardest obstacle in the end, it took me some time to prepare and take with me without wasting food. In the end, all the backs fitted on my bicycle, halfway in the afternoon I went. Off to the train station, writing the first chapter of my new life. Taking the bicycle on the train was an outcome, the moment it came to my awareness lot’s of questions were answered. In the train I booked a hotel for the coming days, in a quiet and peaceful environment. The last hurdle before moving across, deciding where to land in Spain.
After arriving at my first destination, in the days that came, I started to explore the area by bicycle. Online I saw pictures of a Bed & Breakfast that looked very similar to the visualizations of my dream house. It wasn’t available at that time, so I couldn’t book. Out of curiosity, I decided to go and have a look. Halfway cycling, I started to recognize the roads that I was driving on. Exactly the same as in my vision during my journey, with false flat corners flowing to the left and right. Forest trees on the left and right, occasionally a car parked on the side. About 15 minutes later I arrived at the Bed & Breakfast. Characteristics: garage with drive in going downward, small garden around the house, terrace faced toward the sun and looked through the forest, large windows for light coming in, light colors interior and modern exterior. Like a puzzle it clicked. Amazed for a couple of minutes I stared at the view, before turning around and pointing my vision towards the beaches and the sun.
Being Left Stranded on the Street Without a Plan
One week after New Year’s Day I took the next leap of faith. I was halfway of leaving behind my old life and needed to follow through. Scary it was, yet I found the courage to go anyway. The day before I left, I saw an offer on a booking website that fitted my budget that was running out. With the last money I had at that time, I first booked the room. While I was in the train to the airport I booked a ticket, one of last that were left, taking the risk that my luggage would fit. And finally I booked a PCR test that was still ongoing during that time. My bike I left at the train station and I carried my stuff with me. The PCR test was fine, the plain ticket was accepted, and the luggage and security check were all okay. After spending the night at the airport, off I went, leaving behind everything.
Side note: during that night, I created and launched a 30 Days of Abundance challenge from scratch, to cover the hours. A group of people signed up straight away, every morning they received a couple of prompts to give them a new perspective and to break through their current limits. Helping them to find joy in their lives.
There I was, at my destination, in a room at someone else’s house. I tried to get something up and running online, which actually worked. Only thing I forgot, was adding a checkout page to my website. Everything who might have tried to buy an ebook or a session would have been left behind. While the whole week the guy I stayed with was talking in my ear to take a job. I’ll spare you the details. Determined as I was I didn’t. Only one goal in mind, getting my own business up and running. The focus was especially within, it took a while for the world outside of me to catch up. After a week staying in the room, I was on the street. No money, no friends around, no job, no place to live.
With friends and total strangers helping me out, I found my way. A friend of mine booked me a hostel, yet the payment wasn’t accepted. A couple of minutes of discussion and being judged I decided to give up. Staying on the street for one night, scary as it was, the next evening I prepared to do the same. A man from France with roots in Morocco walked by and asked me how I was. Explaining my situation was enough, his kindness and generosity was worth a million to me. He took me to the same hostel of the night before, the same discussion and judgment, yet he managed to book a bed and breakfast for me and himself. While we were talking and sharing experiences, it turned out that he had a similar job as the last one I had, was similar situations where the company was stuck. With some tips how to handle that, I gave him something back. Gratitude I felt throughout my whole body, I slept like a rose, despite noise of other people around me.
From this hostel I went to another one and could book a bed for one night. I had food to cover for the whole week, a place to sleep was the main priority. In the midst of all the turmoil, seeing homeless people around me every day, my mind reminded me about couch surfing and work-a-way stays. I tried to contact some people, but they backed down or didn’t answer. One guy did and I could sleep on his couch for a night. Later, when I had arrived at his place, I looked at my missed messages and saw that he wanted to cancel. Thank God I didn’t see that before. I thanked him for helping me out and went off to look for a solution. Using multiple apps and websites, one guy in a town further contacted me. He had space he told me and invited me over.
Arriving at the Beach that I Pictured in My Mind
With joy and gratitude I started to walk with all my belongings. A lot of resistance coming up along the way, pausing and letting go, it took me 8 hours to get to the location. No idea what held me up, I tried a lot of things not to go, even trying to sell stuff to be able to book a place instead. About 1,5 hour before I finally got there, I got a phone call, asking how nearby I was. When I responded, the guy asked me if I minded to sleep on the beach. That was a question I never would have expected, not knowing how to answer, I told him that I would look when arriving. He had a spare sleeping bag and according to him it was quite ‘hot’ for the time of the year. Turned out that he didn’t have a house himself as well, and was looking for someone to accompany him. No wonder all the resistance along the way. Despite that, having nowhere else to go at that moment, I decided to stay.
That night was the first time I fell asleep staring at the stars and waking up during sunrise. There I was, at the beach that I pictured in my imagination, exactly how I had imagined it. Yet, the imagining stopped with that, also during the time in between the picture and reality, and so did I as well. The guy saved my life, providing food for me the first 2 weeks, before the moment that he went a bit crazy. A couple of weeks later, I saved his life twice in the middle of the night, when he almost choked out of dehydration. For about 8 weeks we stayed together, helping each other, while he showed me around in the nearby towns. Every day, I was full on focused on my yoga, energy work to heal PTSD and childhood trauma, and networking to get something going. The gap between us became bigger every day, with him falling back into old patterns, while I was breaking them and former new ones. One morning, all of sudden, he said goodbye and jumped on a train.
Three months I stayed on the beach, before I found a job to provide for myself (I declined the first 2 offers). Believe it or not, while going through this uncertain time, I had the mental capacity to keep my aim straight. Doing yoga sessions almost every day, followed by walking at least 10 km. Writing morning pages, including ho’oponopono, creating a new vision to aim for. Studying a health and nutrition certification program, human design, and other subjects of interest. Building 2 websites on Wordpress, including a newsletter, and a couple of offerings and services. Launching a business online and creating a third website. Connecting with and interviewing real estate investors in the nearby areas. Even being in contact with someone who had a house for sale with rooms that could be rented out (almost decided to go there). Posting on social media every day, with feed and stories. Creating profiles online for freelance work and on recruiting platforms. Doing some administrative work for a man that had a salad bar at a local outlet center. I rewired my brain completely.
Side note: since I had no storage put all the belongings I had with me, they were outside up for grabs for 3 months. Yet, somehow throughout the whole period, no one ever touched them. It still amazes me.
During this period, I had never felt so peaceful before. With the ocean waves, the beach, the stars at night, and the sunlight on my face. There were definitely times that were heavy, yet somehow I knew it would turn my way. Contacts that I had online told me that I was being guided. Not really knowing what that meant, I went with it. Now I know that they were right, their support from a distance was very valuable. I had something to fall back upon, all the new habits that I had build before I left everything behind. Instead of focusing on all the negative stuff, I looked for abundance all around me. Joy is limitless and comes in many ways, so it has been for me. Walks of love, saying ‘I love you’ randomly to everyone and everything around me changed my life for the better. Over time, I started to trust myself and my body more deeply, recognizing what my body tried to tell me all along. That I am enough, that I am loved, that I am safe, and that I am whole. Most of all, that I am at home in my body, no matter the place where I live.
Life lessons I learned in a very short time:
The universe is very literal, you get what you ask for. Being able to picture something very specific and accepting it as already done, brings it to you. Instead of imagining something huge, like I did, build it up from small to bigger. Confidence with this grows over time. It underlines how much power you’ve got within you.
Thinking about something is great, taking the little daily action steps make all the difference. It’s much easier to keep a habit that is small and doesn’t take up that much mental space. Training your mind on a subconscious level is possible through these action steps. It becomes a part of your being, while you no longer have to think about it.
Everything starts within, what you recognize within yourself, you will see proof of in the outside world. Start by looking for proof within yourself, what brings joy, gratitude, confidence, and trust. Practice that what gives you more of this and you always have a solid baseline to fall back upon. All of this lives within you, has no limits, and is unbreakable. Something to rely on at all times, no matter the circumstances.
Abundance has no limits, it’s all around you and within you. Coming from a place of abundance is where fear, anxiety, doubt, and worry cannot exist. The more you persist to live from this place, the more the negative stuff fades away. Eventually you’re able to get to a place where it no longer affects you. Letting go becomes the easiest thing in the world.
There’s a difference between an active brain and a passive brain. You can have a strong preference for one of both. An active brain thinks in steps, in structures, is more logical, and loves to plan the journey from A to B. Giving a lot of energy to thinking things out is beneficial. While a passive brain is more for taking in huge chunks of information at once, seeing patterns straight away, jumping from one point to another, seeing things in a fluid matter. Giving a lot of energy to thinking things out is exhausting. Observing and picking out what’s useful does the trick. See what applies to you and play with it. The moment you’re in a place of uncertainty, your mind is hardwired to take the steps and get you out of it.
Once the aim is clear, surrendering is all that is needed. Even when it’s scary as shit, you’ll get there. Get out of your own way, trust your body, and go for it. Surrendering is often seen as giving up everything, and ‘just having to deal with it or accept it’, that’s nonsense. Surrendering is having something to live for and trusting yourself completely. While giving up all control of how something should go or when and how it should happen. It’s a form of flow that gives you access to the full experience and feeling this within every cell of your body.
You’ve got a higher self that guides you through this life. You can connect with your higher self through meditative journeys, by feeling within your body what your body tries to tell you, and by putting your mind on observation. The voice of your higher self is loving, at first it can be not that clear. The more you connect with your higher self and live from your heart, the stronger it’s presence becomes.
Looking for someone to guide you through a big transformation? I provide coaching and 3 month trajectory programs to help you along your way. You learn how to trust yourself on a very deep level, to always come from a place of joy, and to welcome abundance into your life. Let me know how I can help you.
